Jerry Peet / Lily Orchard / Lily Peet / Valkyrstudios / Bhaalspawn / Tara Callie / "Mod Ebara" - Sociopath writer of pedophile fanfiction and cartoon reviews, faked getting raped to force a divorce, then mobbed and gaslit their ex off Tumblr, satanist neoliberal of the MovieSlob variety, also wants to fuck dogs and/or pokemon

ExceptionallyExceptional

I farted in my hazmat suit.
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Gotta love that self-importance. If I'm not a part of it, it must be dead.
To be fair, even a lot of old school Trekkies will tell you that Star Trek is, indeed, dead. Sure there's Star Trek: Discovery and the new Picard series, but a lot of people agree that the JewJew Abrams movies weren't Trek and that they were more or less just puppeteering the rigored corpse of Star Trek with everything after.
It's really sad to accept, but there it is. Star Trek gave it's last dying breaths in the mid 2000s. At least Enterprise, for all it's flaws, still FELT like Trek. This new shit just doesn't. At least not to me, and not to a lot of people.

Still, even at their worst Trekkies were pretty chill. The worst shit we ever had was autistic arguments over whether Picard's cool, shrewd, tactical style was better than Kirk's balls-to-the-wall, rough and tumble, "damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead!" style.

They were actually fairly civil. Jerry would have fucking hated it.
 

Son Goku Baku

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So Lalaina is going to be a "poor traumatized bean" who does whatever the fuck she wants with everyone around them and never even apoligizes for it even if it was blatantly unfair, like knocking out someone when they were just talking. This is coming from the exact same author that has no issue telling mentally ill people that their mental health is no excuse to treat people like crap.

Yep, this is Liliana's writing alright.
 
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Ben Laden

Movin' and groovin'
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Kylo Ren: *Lashes our emotionally, called out for being a loser bitch boy*

Darth Lily: *Lashes our emotionally, justified because Luke is stinky*

These are from the same story. Aliana is basically just what Lily wishes Kylo Ren was; a poc lesbian space witch who sleeps with the pure, bright eyed protag.
 

emmens

Certified Fanfic Critic
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Lily: Worldbuilding and lore is stupid and should be avoided in story telling.

Also Lily: https://archive.li/DmcxX
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. Aliana is basically just what Lily wishes Kylo Ren was; a poc lesbian space witch who sleeps with the pure, bright eyed protag.
You've probably saved me an entire book of deconstructing every single chapter of the stupid rewrite. Still gonna try to go through with it anyway
 
Lily: Worldbuilding and lore is stupid and should be avoided in story telling.

Also Lily: https://archive.li/DmcxX
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You've probably saved me an entire book of deconstructing every single chapter of the stupid rewrite. Still gonna try to go through with it anyway
With Lily it really boils down to "People enjoying something that I don't enjoy are stupid and wrong".

One moment she geeks out over lightsaber styles and super special lightsaber crystals and in the next...

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...she calls people dumb for geeking out over something she has no interest in.

Either that or she is seriously too stupid to grasp the concept of colour symbolism, a.k.a. the entire reason why the Bad Guys had a red lightsabers while the Good Guys had a blue/green ones. Knowing how incredibly ignorant she can be about basic concepts of writing, it wouldn't surprise me if that never occured to her.
 

Son Goku Baku

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Rey having a orange lightsaber could actually be a interesting point about her character because not only orange can represent energy, the sun, life, optimism, etc, but on another metaphorical level it could mean having an alternative morality that is outside of the average red/blue. If Rey is not either a Jedi or a Sith, having been taught by a Sith the good part of the dark side, then it makes sense for the color of her lightsaber be different than them.

It would actually add another layer of meaning to her garbage shitty self insert story. But as we all know, Liliana hates making things interesting and she just throw out of the window without any consideration and instead will info dump a bunch of useless notes that nobody fucking cares and will probably never be relevant on the story. As always.

Moreover, I hate that Lalaina's name is Darth Amorososa. It's the type of name that a kid would think about. It's so corny and on the nose it's frankly embarassing this came out from an almost thirty year old woman. Have some self-respect.
 

SubarashiiRage

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With Lily it really boils down to "People enjoying something that I don't enjoy are stupid and wrong".

One moment she geeks out over lightsaber styles and super special lightsaber crystals and in the next...

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...she calls people dumb for geeking out over something she has no interest in.

Either that or she is seriously too stupid to grasp the concept of colour symbolism, a.k.a. the entire reason why the Bad Guys had a red lightsabers while the Good Guys had a blue/green ones. Knowing how incredibly ignorant she can be about basic concepts of writing, it wouldn't surprise me if that never occured to her.
Lily has a serious problem of not being able to answer a question without insulting someone

one of the people who put meaning in the lightsaber colors was the creator of Star Wars, but that doesn’t matter what makes the story important are the lore about your OC’s ship, your headcanon of the lesbian matriarchs who founded the true and wholesome empowered by love Sith Order and explanation of how super special crystals make your lightsaber morally better than others
 

Lurkio

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Wow she kicked a man in his 60s who hasn't trained in years in the jaw, God what a hero, what a fun and cool character to follow.
I wish I could channel my spite for others into writing. Like replace Luke with "Randy from School" or "that one guy on Reddit who made fun of my Pokemon comic" and this starts to make more sense.
I feel like this is more Lily venting her frustration that the OG trilogy will widely be considered the best set of Star Wars movies by the majority of Star Wars fans despite being the least edgy of the films and the ones least able to fuel his lesbian fetishes.

Hey @emmens, you've been reviewing each chapter of this schlock, maybe you could quickly put together a quick bullet point list of all the shit that makes Aliana a Mary-Sue for convenience sake? Anyways, last I checked, having your OC beat the crap out the the main character in the canon ranks pretty high up on that list for most people, so it's not surprising Lily threw this is his story. In fact, I'm surprised that it took this long for him to get to here.
 
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emmens

Certified Fanfic Critic
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Hey @emmens, you've been reviewing each chapter of this schlock, maybe you could quickly put together a quick bullet point list of all the shit that makes Aliana a Mary-Sue for convenience sake?
Aliana has...
  • literally stomped the floor with Kylo Ren every single time they've interacted, one of those times being entirely unarmed against someone with a lightsaber.
  • derailed all of Rey's relationships with the rest of the cast
  • Is a Sith, but not an evil sith when every canonical example of a sith has never not been evil.
  • Specifically from a splinter of Sith that weren't evil
  • and further more, specifically comes from a family of both Sith and Jedi.
  • Somehow knows about Anakin and Palpatine and other weirdly specific details aout star wars lore as if they're being written from a meta perspective
  • Has became the interest of literally everyone Good and Evil in the story to the point Snoke wants her or Rey to replace Kylo Ren
  • Doesn't hide being a sith and somehow isn't instantly being attacked by literally everyone around her
  • mere presence makes the canon cast behave nothing like how they behave inthe movies.
I could go on but this is just the first things coming to my mind

Edit: added a couple more
 
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Ben Laden

Movin' and groovin'
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  • Is a Sith, but not an evil sith when every canonical example of a sith has never not been evil.
"My character is a nazi, but like, not the kind that gases Trump's Chosen People, just the kind that wants Germany to return to its former glory. That's all. They actually find Trump's Chosen women very attractive and would totes kill other Nazis to protect cute Trump's Chosen People!"
 

ShiftyBoi

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Bliss, more Contra shit
You know ambivalent just means neutral right? Not mean enough to hate, but not well informed enough to argue for, so just ambivalent. It's the thing everyone hates Boogie for, but Boogie's problem is that it's the only position he takes.
 
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Suck the Cock

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I don't even know where to begin
By "keeping things to the point" do you mean having an entire monologue about how many women your self-insert has slept with?
Most of these asks are sent by you anyway you desperate faggot.
I know how much of a dangerous rabbit hole it is to try and understand what's going on in Jerry's head, but I think I get what he's going for. If a story includes details about lightsabers in between lesbian sex scenes it sucks because it's interrupting the lesbian sex. But if a story has details about lightsabers that you have to trawl an obscure person's tumblr for, it's good because you asked for it. But also if you want to know too many details about lightsabers you're an idiot and it would make a bad story, only certain details about lightsabers that are interesting to Jerry. So it all circles back to the same thing as ever, Jerry doesn't like being forced to engage with something that doesn't appeal to his immediate desires. If he wants lesbian sex, he deserves it. If he wants deep lore, he deserves it. And he needs a franchise that will deliver both depending on what he searches for.
 
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Son Goku Baku

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Not mean enough to hate, but not well informed enough to argue for, so just ambivalent.
To reach such a reasonable and fair conclusion you would have to be fair and reasonable.

You can't do that and bash Nataly for being the more succesful, articulated and popular lesbian trans woman on Youtube without even needing to be angry all the time everything she does at the same time. Liliana has decided that this lesbian trans woman that is thousand times more likeable than her despite Liliana being on the platform for longer is going to be her point of reference for everything she is never going to be an "evil centrist" and won't let it go.

Besides, we know that Liliana's idea of activism and advocating for other groups she barely knows about is not inform herself, it's not researching, it's not asking questions, but simply fuck it up and say insanely idiotic things until a friend (and only a friend, everyone else is a nazi) tells you on the nicest tone possible what is the deal actually. Or simply repeat verbatim what other people said without even knowing why they say it, expecting people to simply repeat the same way without asking any question themselves.

Yes, I'm suggesting that on some level Liliana is just mad that a trans lesbian that is nothing like her is better than her in literally every single way. From Contrapoint you can say what you wish, but at least you're not going to find rumour of she possesing child pornography. Or being abusive. Or plagiarizing entire pages for her script. Or advocating for violence in response to people dealing with mental illneses. Or being the creative mind behind sockpuppets account that were literally rapist and pedophiles. Or lying about stabbing people on the street like it was a good thing. Or claiming to be another race while being obviously white. Or forcing her friends into sexual situations they were not comfortable with.
 
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ShiftyBoi

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Aliana has...
  • literally stomped the floor with Kylo Ren every single time they've interacted, one of those times being entirely unarmed against someone with a lightsaber.
  • derailed all of Rey's relationships with the rest of the cast
  • Is a Sith, but not an evil sith when every canonical example of a sith has never not been evil.
  • Specifically from a splinter of Sith that weren't evil
  • and further more, specifically comes from a family of both Sith and Jedi.
  • Somehow knows about Anakin and Palpatine and other weirdly specific details aout star wars lore as if they're being written from a meta perspective
  • Has became the interest of literally everyone Good and Evil in the story to the point Snoke wants her or Rey to replace Kylo Ren
  • Doesn't hide being a sith and somehow isn't instantly being attacked by literally everyone around her
  • mere presence makes the canon cast behave nothing like how they behave inthe movies.
I could go on but this is just the first things coming to my mind

Edit: added a couple more
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"Why are we still here? Just to suffer?"
It's not even that the Mary Sue Character does impressive things, it's just that your way of improving the story is just adding juvenile elements you enjoy, like more prequel fighting, or a boring self insert that takes away from every character and becomes the central focus.
Oh sorry, that's me the sad man baby Nazi speaking out of turn, I'm sorry for criticizing your Star wars fan fiction staring Darth Amarosa, who's cooler than Kylo Ren and gets to sleep with Rey in the end. Goo goo, maybe I'll understand when I'm 27.
 
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