KF Investigates! (Spring 2020) The Pedophile Dogfucker Files - Tom tries to groom a child and gets exposed on Instagram


A thousand years old
True & Honest Fan
The funniest part about Tom being "scared" to jerk off to pictures he thinks are trafficked children says more about his porn collection than it does about his moral virtual signaling.
It’s very telling. That he’s concerned primarily with trafficking rather than the inherently abusive nature of child sexual exploitation suggests, once again, that he is fine in principle with the idea of child sexual abuse as long as they weren’t forced into it. Of course, the fact that there are many methods of coercion that don’t use direct force never comes up. Probably so he feels better about his uncontrollable pedo lust. He’s into fapping over pubescent-looking girls, but it’s okay because he’s not directly participating in trafficking. Of course, people like him are responsible for creating the demand that leads to trafficking.

FUN FACT: Jimmy Savile claimed he didn’t own a computer in case people accused him of downloading CP. It’s possible to protest too much, Tommie.


They said this bomb was clean
True & Honest Fan
What’s his autistic fixation on “millennial mental midgets?” Makes him sound like a 60s Batman villain, except child molesting is a bit dark for that series.
Robin: "Eh gads Batman, Touchy Tooter has broken out of Gotham State Penitentiary!"
Batman: "Steady on old chum, we'll have that percussive pedafile back behind bars in no time, to the Bat Cave!"


Beating my meat like everyone's watching.
True & Honest Fan
I've always enjoyed how Tom is so hypocritical when it comes to netiquette. He sputters and rages about 'keyboard warriors' hiding behind a screen and then proceed to challenge complete strangers with veiled threats of just how dangerous he is. We've straight up got proof that when ole' Tombomb gets threatened he instantly cowers up with a dribble of fear piss running down his leg.

His unhealthy obsession with people more than half his age is something he vehemently defends while damning himself in the same sentence. He's tried to coerce confused/conflicted transgender teens to 'come and stay with him' so he can 'mother them' because he wants to play the role of matron. Why anyone would want to come and even visit his hovel is a mystery onto itself given one glimpse would have any sane person realizing their mistake and running back home at the first chance they had.

Tom's just that sad, greasy stoner that wasted his life. Instead of being welcomed into any number of social circles his depraved, sleazy demeanor drives them all away one by one. Hippies don't want him. Transexuals don't want him. The rock collector community doesn't want him and The Hut is clearly happy that he's gone. The only people on the same level as him are the perverts just as equally desperate and hungry for attention. He never started a family and he's nowhere near close to his own. He's trying to reclaim some lost semblance of community and his pickings are getting ever slimmer.


True & Honest Fan
Still obsessing over children


Don't forget!!


Sheriff of CWCville

When Tom dies of a stroke after he rips his last toke of Mexican reg in the middle of his crack den, how long do you reckon he’ll lie in there before anyone checks?

If I had to guess I’d say he’d be two-spirit soup all over the ground before anyone finds him. You have to figure the smell wouldn’t be out of the ordinary so nobody would see any cause for concern.