Ralph's Height -

RichardRApe

Overcircumsized;Underappreciated
kiwifarms.net
I think he's probably over 300 lbs.
Physically the only way he's not over 300 is if he's 5'1 or shorter.
1617824625620.png
 

Ij999

Dukat Did Nothing Wrong
kiwifarms.net
Honestly I think Ethan Ralph’s funniest line ever is “DO I LOOK 5’1 BITCH?!” Something about the cadence of his white trash accent, mixed with his absolute sincerity in his offence over such an infantile accusation is unbelievably funny to me. He’s like a five year old trapped in the body of a 300 pound, 5’1 wigger.
 

REGENDarySumanai

Quack Attack
Local Moderator
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Dick is six feet flat and can rest his chin easily on Gunt's head. If that's the most damning statement for Gunt's height, then there are probably even dumber ways of doing so.
 

Squeezit Henderson

kiwifarms.net
Well, as a PhD in guntology, my analysis points to 4'10'' - 5'6''.
Can't be bothered to do the wheel right now. I'd appreciate if anyone can find the model of any one of these cars:
View attachment 2063733
I'm sure the wheels are supposed to be 18 inches in diameter, it's regulated by the state, but let's be 1000% sure.
The Miami Beach police cruiser is probably a Crown Vic, they also use another model that I don't know what it is, but those all seem to have a bumper guard thing.

5908508233_5ef1f3af40_o-800x600.jpg

MBPD supervisor vehicles do not seem to have the bumper guard, though.

florida-south-fl-miami-beach-police-car-vehicle-sightseeing-visitors-FJCY7R.jpgmbpd_single_car.jpg__1140x430_q90_crop_subject_location-979,931_subsampling-2.jpg
 

FFinfo

kiwifarms.net
Exterior door heights are standardized to 80 inches in the US. Likewise, the viewport on the door has to be at least six inches from the edge of the door. From the fight video, assuming it's exactly 6 inches and playing in Ralph's favor, he comes up about a total of a foot shy of the door top given his head is midway through the panes. He'd be hovering in the range of 5'6"-5'8".
The only way he isn't is if he ran up to the door both times on his tip-toes (which I don't put past him).

edit: Oh shit, that's including his shoes, though, right. So take an inch from that, but it's still above midget territory.
 

TriggerMeElmo

kiwifarms.net
Dick is six feet flat and can rest his chin easily on Gunt's head. If that's the most damning statement for Gunt's height, then there are probably even dumber ways of doing so.
Or you can poke his stomach like the Pillsbury Doughboy. That really pisses him off. If we want a different measure then someone should get him to pose in front of his car. A Sentra is 4'9" in height.
 

Benzo Samurai

kiwifarms.net
aren't there prison records? i guess not since you guys are still discussing it, but what a damn shame. We do have the in-car streams with faith, could we deduce something from that?
 

WeWuzFinns

Armed with the cap of flame and goggles of speed.
kiwifarms.net
aren't there prison records? i guess not since you guys are still discussing it, but what a damn shame. We do have the in-car streams with faith, could we deduce something from that?
During his prison sentence he was bent over most of the time so there isn't any accurate record. Loose ass Ralph is what they used to call him inside. Now his only retort is to drink to make the memories of prison rape disappear.
 

AnOminous

each malted milk ball might be their last
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
It doesn't matter how tall he really is he's still a mental midget.
He's not extremely assmad about that, though. He doesn't realize he's a mental manlet as well as a physical one, because of Dunning-Kruger, but he's very, very upset about the fact that he is a physical manlet, a stark fact of reality he can't avoid.
Honestly I think Ethan Ralph’s funniest line ever is “DO I LOOK 5’1 BITCH?!”
And it's funny because yes, he does look 5'1". Just put him in one of those munchkin outfits and he would not look out of place representing the Lollipop Guild in the Wizard of Oz.
 

REGENDarySumanai

Quack Attack
Local Moderator
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
He's not extremely assmad about that, though. He doesn't realize he's a mental manlet as well as a physical one, because of Dunning-Kruger, but he's very, very upset about the fact that he is a physical manlet, a stark fact of reality he can't avoid.

And it's funny because yes, he does look 5'1". Just put him in one of those munchkin outfits and he would not look out of place representing the Lollipop Guild in the Wizard of Oz.
He's the only one left because he ate them all.
 

Mr E. Grifter

Suits me.
kiwifarms.net
He's either considerably shorter than he says, or considerably fatter.

Or both to a moderate degree.

No, seeing as he didn't go to prison.
I'm more inclined to believe Ralph on his weight, it does not get under his skin as much as the jabs about his height. Which I find strange, if asked about whether I'd rather by 5'6" or 275lb I would choose the former every time.

Personally, I think the 5"5'-5"6' range is probably more accurate. Although I would wager on the lower side.

Just basing this on Ralph's relative height next to the door, the similar morphology of fatties around that height and weight.
 

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