Ralph's Height -

LurkTrawl

If being good was easy the world would be paradise
kiwifarms.net
I'm more inclined to believe Ralph on his weight, it does not get under his skin as much as the jabs about his height. Which I find strange, if asked about whether I'd rather by 5'6" or 275lb I would choose the former every time.

Personally, I think the 5"5'-5"6' range is probably more accurate. Although I would wager on the lower side.
The only way his weight would match up with his size is if he were 5'0 or 5'1". I don't believe Ralph about anything and he for some reason has this capacity to get people to doubt obvious shit... like his height/weight. If he's really 5'5" or above he'd be well over 300 lbs to be that fucking rotund.

The reason his height gets under his skin so much is that it's calling him on a lie and he's painfully aware of how sad it is that he'd act so tough at 5'1". As far as I'm concerned I have no reason to doubt the police report, and Ralph's word is so fouled at this point by his own propensity to lie that I'm actively encouraged to believe the opposite of what he says when it comes to shit like this.
 

AnOminous

each malted milk ball might be their last
True & Honest Fan
Retired Staff
kiwifarms.net
The reason his height gets under his skin so much is that it's calling him on a lie and he's painfully aware of how sad it is that he'd act so tough at 5'1".
Imagine being a midget in so many ways, literally midget height, mentally a midget, a moral midget, and having a micropenis. There is nothing large about this man other than his weight. He is a midget by every other conceivable measure.
 

Mr E. Grifter

Suits me.
kiwifarms.net
The only way his weight would match up with his size is if he were 5'0 or 5'1". I don't believe Ralph about anything and he for some reason has this capacity to get people to doubt obvious shit... like his height/weight. If he's really 5'5" or above he'd be well over 300 lbs to be that fucking rotund.

The reason his height gets under his skin so much is that it's calling him on a lie and he's painfully aware of how sad it is that he'd act so tough at 5'1". As far as I'm concerned I have no reason to doubt the police report, and Ralph's word is so fouled at this point by his own propensity to lie that I'm actively encouraged to believe the opposite of what he says when it comes to shit like this.
I disagree, I was looking at progress pictures in a previous post. The guy who was 5'7 and 270lb was similar to Ralph in shape and size. While I would say Ralph was worse, losing a couple of inchs and adding on a couple of lbs and I would say that was a relatively close match.

Even 5'5 is pretty embarrassing for Ralph given he has vehemently insisted he was definitely 5'11... or did he say 5'10.... perhaps 5'7? Whichever way you play it, Ralph is buttmad he's a manlet and has lied to cover up that fact.
 

LurkTrawl

If being good was easy the world would be paradise
kiwifarms.net
I disagree, I was looking at progress pictures in a previous post. The guy who was 5'7 and 270lb was similar to Ralph in shape and size. While I would say Ralph was worse, losing a couple of inchs and adding on a couple of lbs and I would say that was a relatively close match.

Even 5'5 is pretty embarrassing for Ralph given he has vehemently insisted he was definitely 5'11... or did he say 5'10.... perhaps 5'7? Whichever way you play it, Ralph is buttmad he's a manlet and has lied to cover up that fact.
I've worked with a guy who was 5'4" and 320 lbs. Ralph's bigger around than he was.

Believing Ralph at all over a police report is an analogy unto itself. Like I said he's either shorter than he says he is or much fatter, and it's obvious to anyone who's been around a deathfat who's around that height. I'm going with the police report because Ralph has negative credibility when it comes to pretty much anything that would embarrass him, and generally speaking police take really accurate records to make identifying suspects easier in the future.

I seriously will never understand his ability to get people to give him reasonable doubt after he's been shown both to be a habitual hypocrite and liar, repeatedly.
 

MeltyTW

kiwifarms.net
aren't there prison records? i guess not since you guys are still discussing it, but what a damn shame. We do have the in-car streams with faith, could we deduce something from that?
there is the booking info that ralph denies without a shred of proof to show them being wrong, he doesnt even say how they got a "wrong" number he just tells people theyre wrong

I'm more inclined to believe Ralph on his weight, it does not get under his skin as much as the jabs about his height. Which I find strange, if asked about whether I'd rather by 5'6" or 275lb I would choose the former every time.
the gunt joke was the original corn joke times 20, he got so ass pained at being called fat he tanked his career and started a down spiral of paranoia that led to the insular shrinking police state that is his "fan"base today so no. this was well before alot of kf got involved but trust me, the gunt jokes made him start flagging a whole lot more, care a lot less about being known as a flaggot, and made him burn bridges with former gold stars etc etc etc he had it banned from his stream me chat, never assume ralph isnt asspained he got dolphin emotes banned site wide for mocking his laugh
The only way his weight would match up with his size is if he were 5'0 or 5'1". I don't believe Ralph about anything and he for some reason has this capacity to get people to doubt obvious shit... like his height/weight. If he's really 5'5" or above he'd be well over 300 lbs to be that fucking rotund.
I seriously will never understand his ability to get people to give him reasonable doubt after he's been shown both to be a habitual hypocrite and liar, repeatedly.
i think its because people are primed for disappointment on this site (to the point the middle of the road paths for predictions or theories is the most often agreed with even if not the most likely) and ralph never takes the l on anything to the point people want to force him with literal court grade fbi tier evidence and this mixes to "well we dont have a video of an aylawg holding ralph down and measuring him so ill prime myself for disappointment and guess hes actually a normal height". even though he is proven time and time again to be at most a 5'1 midget, if anything ralph should be thanking us for rounding up to 5'1
 

Mundane Ralph

kiwifarms.net
I disagree, I was looking at progress pictures in a previous post. The guy who was 5'7 and 270lb was similar to Ralph in shape and size. While I would say Ralph was worse, losing a couple of inchs and adding on a couple of lbs and I would say that was a relatively close match.

Even 5'5 is pretty embarrassing for Ralph given he has vehemently insisted he was definitely 5'11... or did he say 5'10.... perhaps 5'7? Whichever way you play it, Ralph is buttmad he's a manlet and has lied to cover up that fact.
Ralph has claimed 5'11", 5'10", 5'9", 5'8", 5'7", and then recently 5'8" followed by 5'9" again. He's 5'5" and 400lbs. The gunt is not normal human fat. It has evolved an unnatural density so that any food scraps falling from Ethan's mouth or spilled liquor are pulled into it by gravitational force.
 

Mr E. Grifter

Suits me.
kiwifarms.net
there is the booking info that ralph denies without a shred of proof to show them being wrong, he doesnt even say how they got a "wrong" number he just tells people theyre wrong


the gunt joke was the original corn joke times 20, he got so ass pained at being called fat he tanked his career and started a down spiral of paranoia that led to the insular shrinking police state that is his "fan"base today so no. this was well before alot of kf got involved but trust me, the gunt jokes made him start flagging a whole lot more, care a lot less about being known as a flaggot, and made him burn bridges with former gold stars etc etc etc he had it banned from his stream me chat, never assume ralph isnt asspained he got dolphin emotes banned site wide for mocking his laugh


i think its because people are primed for disappointment on this site (to the point the middle of the road paths for predictions or theories is the most often agreed with even if not the most likely) and ralph never takes the l on anything to the point people want to force him with literal court grade fbi tier evidence and this mixes to "well we dont have a video of an aylawg holding ralph down and measuring him so ill prime myself for disappointment and guess hes actually a normal height". even though he is proven time and time again to be at most a 5'1 midget, if anything ralph should be thanking us for rounding up to 5'1
Admittedly, I was not aware of any of the Stream.me stuff when it was going on as I didn't have as much free time to laugh at these retards as this plague has afforded me. So fair enough on that part, I concede.

On the height though, I just don't see it. If we take Ralph is 5'1 and Diddler Dax is 6'0 then Dax should be a full head above Ralph (Not based on Ralph's enormous Swede). In the original Gunt shot, even taking into account Ralph stretching and Dax leaning over slightly there clearly isn't a full head between them. Maybe 2/3rds.

Plus, Ralph is a short man, but he's not that short. You start looking at celebrities who hover around 5'1 and they are visibly small. Here are two images of Scientology leader David Miscavige who is confirmed as 5'1. He makes Tom Cruise - 5'7 - look tall.

1618153431737.png
1618153391351.png

Even comparing pictures of Ralph with this "highly scientific" - obviously to be taken with a pinch or two of salt -height comparison site I would be hard pushed to think Ralph could possibly be 5'1 if Dax is indeed 6'0

6'0 compared to 5'6
1618153813049.png


6'0 compared to 5'1.
1618153841857.png

Ralph is not this short when compared to Dax. Now sure it says 5'1 on his police report, and in isolation I would take that as confirmation of his height, but I just cannot reconcile that with the pictures of him. As much as I would love for Ralph to be that short - he just doesn't seem to be.
 

MeltyTW

kiwifarms.net
Admittedly, I was not aware of any of the Stream.me stuff when it was going on as I didn't have as much free time to laugh at these retards as this plague has afforded me. So fair enough on that part, I concede.

On the height though, I just don't see it. If we take Ralph is 5'1 and Diddler Dax is 6'0 then Dax should be a full head above Ralph (Not based on Ralph's enormous Swede). In the original Gunt shot, even taking into account Ralph stretching and Dax leaning over slightly there clearly isn't a full head between them. Maybe 2/3rds.

Plus, Ralph is a short man, but he's not that short. You start looking at celebrities who hover around 5'1 and they are visibly small. Here are two images of Scientology leader David Miscavige who is confirmed as 5'1. He makes Tom Cruise - 5'7 - look tall.

View attachment 2078318View attachment 2078317

Even comparing pictures of Ralph with this "highly scientific" - obviously to be taken with a pinch or two of salt -height comparison site I would be hard pushed to think Ralph could possibly be 5'1 if Dax is indeed 6'0

6'0 compared to 5'6
View attachment 2078326

6'0 compared to 5'1.
View attachment 2078327
Ralph is not this short when compared to Dax. Now sure it says 5'1 on his police report, and in isolation I would take that as confirmation of his height, but I just cannot reconcile that with the pictures of him. As much as I would love for Ralph to be that short - he just doesn't seem to be.
that 5'1 guy totally looks ralphs height though, and the gunt picture hes both wearing unidentified shoes, dax and co are leaning and hes supporting himself on them. ralphs just going to say why (if any actual non cope reason) he thinks the police report is wrong because i dont think it should overturned just because you dont eyeball ralph at being 5'1

Ralph has claimed 5'11", 5'10", 5'9", 5'8", 5'7", and then recently 5'8" followed by 5'9" again. He's 5'5" and 400lbs. The gunt is not normal human fat. It has evolved an unnatural density so that any food scraps falling from Ethan's mouth or spilled liquor are pulled into it by gravitational force.
5'1 and 400 pounds
 

LurkTrawl

If being good was easy the world would be paradise
kiwifarms.net
What's more believable:

>Known borderline sociopathic, narcissistic pathological liar
or
>Police measurement most likely derived from a line system on a wall that hasn't been changed in decades used for probably hundreds of offenders if not thousands just like him

:thinking:

Yeah, he's fucking 5'1" if the police record says so and believing Ralph over that is showing questionable judgement to put it lightly.
 

Sam Losco

Delusional ResetEra tranny
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
What's more believable:

>Known borderline sociopathic, narcissistic pathological liar
or
>Police measurement most likely derived from a line system on a wall that hasn't been changed in decades used for probably hundreds of offenders if not thousands just like him

:thinking:

Yeah, he's fucking 5'1" if the police record says so and believing Ralph over that is showing questionable judgement to put it lightly.
To play Gunts Advocate here, there are least two likely scenarios that could lead the police measurement to be wrong:
  • A simple typo
  • Gunt was drunk at the time so probably had difficulty standing straight. So it's possible he was slumped over enough that they just took his 5'4-5" height as 5'1". Getting his height perfect isn't top priority so they didn't care.
 

LurkTrawl

If being good was easy the world would be paradise
kiwifarms.net
To play Gunts Advocate here, there are least two likely scenarios that could lead the police measurement to be wrong:
  • A simple typo
  • Gunt was drunk at the time so probably had difficulty standing straight. So it's possible he was slumped over enough that they just took his 5'4-5" height as 5'1". Getting his height perfect isn't top priority so they didn't care.
Until I have evidence of either, I'm not going to buy either. And I highly doubt they'd just let a guy slouch so far that it'd knock three full inches off his height when taking their measurement for booking. If anything they'd physically hold him up if they had to - accurate measurement of an offender's height is pretty damn important to get correct during the booking process.

A typo is a convenient excuse that I'm just not willing to give given the other evidence around it, also again due to how important it is for the police to have the correct height of someone who's going on the books. To say nothing, again, of the complete lack of charitable doubt I'm willing to give Ralph on anything that might be embarrassing to him.
 

Bestwestern

kiwifarms.net
Until I have evidence of either, I'm not going to buy either. And I highly doubt they'd just let a guy slouch so far that it'd knock three full inches off his height when taking their measurement for booking. If anything they'd physically hold him up if they had to - accurate measurement of an offender's height is pretty damn important to get correct during the booking process.

A typo is a convenient excuse that I'm just not willing to give given the other evidence around it, also again due to how important it is for the police to have the correct height of someone who's going on the books. To say nothing, again, of the complete lack of charitable doubt I'm willing to give Ralph on anything that might be embarrassing to him.
If they lied on the police report this retard could stand next to any height approximater at a store one of his lives to own the haters and the farms and be the true ralphamale. Because of that he's not 5'6 or whatever he is claiming to be now. Maybe not as short as 5'1 but not far off
 

Mr E. Grifter

Suits me.
kiwifarms.net
What's more believable:

>Known borderline sociopathic, narcissistic pathological liar
or
>Police measurement most likely derived from a line system on a wall that hasn't been changed in decades used for probably hundreds of offenders if not thousands just like him

:thinking:

Yeah, he's fucking 5'1" if the police record says so and believing Ralph over that is showing questionable judgement to put it lightly.
It isn't so much believing Ralph, I don't believe him - he isn't 5'10 for one second.

It's that looking at images of Ralph he doesn't look anything like someone who is 5'1 - not in his general stature, not when comparing him to others who we have a better understanding of height on. It's not just a case of eye-balling it either, I can't say for certain exactly how tall Ralph is - it's a rough estimation.

Back to more reasons why he's unlikely to be 5'1.
1618162462393.png


Michelle Malkin on the left is about 5'1.5. Ralph does have a couple of inches on her. She is likely wearing heels too, from what I can see she wears heels at most of these events.
1618162759962.png


Two to the left of Michelle Malking is Steve King. Now sure she might have different shoes on in both pictures, but her height when compared with Fuentes is about the same. In relation to Steve King, Fuentes seems about the same height. So I would surmise that Ralph is ever so slightly shorter than Steve King.
1618162804462.png


Steve King here is next to Trump. He is slightly shorter here in my estimation than Kanye. Kanye stands at 5'8. I would say by between 2-3 inches.
1618163146635.png


So look, I can't put an exact number on this but it's pretty clear Ralph isn't actually 5'1. Unless he wears platforms, or goes on his tippy toes during every single photo - so I suppose there is an outside chance, but I doubt it. I think 5'6 is a reasonable estimate.
 

LurkTrawl

If being good was easy the world would be paradise
kiwifarms.net
It isn't so much believing Ralph, I don't believe him - he isn't 5'10 for one second.

It's that looking at images of Ralph he doesn't look anything like someone who is 5'1 - not in his general stature, not when comparing him to others who we have a better understanding of height on. It's not just a case of eye-balling it either, I can't say for certain exactly how tall Ralph is - it's a rough estimation.

Back to more reasons why he's unlikely to be 5'1.

View attachment 2078556

Michelle Malkin on the left is about 5'1.5. Ralph does have a couple of inches on her. She is likely wearing heels too.
And by his posture he looks like he's standing on the tips of his toes, yet again.

I'm still going with the police report since it's harder evidence than photos that don't show his feet on the ground and what kind of shoes he's wearing. I'm going to need a level of evidence that contradicts a police booking record and I've yet to see anything close.

Edit: You know what? If anybody can get me the street this photo is from:
1617556718241-png.2058130

and the name of the hotel this photo is from:
1617559245243-png.2058261

I might actually make it a weekend trip sometime this year to go down there and measure both that pole he's standing next to in the first photo and the fencing by the pool in the second photo and take pictures/video of the measurement. Not making any promises though.
 
Last edited:

AltisticRight

Free 🌽 202 E 37th St VA, Richmond, 901-922-9912
Local Moderator
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Gunt was drunk at the time so probably had difficulty standing straight. So it's possible he was slumped over enough that they just took his 5'4-5" height as 5'1". Getting his height perfect isn't top priority so they didn't care.
He fell over and they measured the height of his gunt instead.
So Ralph is 5'4, the gunt is 5'1.
 

DonDaLemon

kiwifarms.net
I wonder if the shithole corner store ralph claimed to be "robbed" at has one of those tape measures attached to the door frame...
 

Similar threads

From /Baph/ to ED to /cow/ and kiwi the internet's toy
Replies
280
Views
44K
Gunt-enabling host of the unpopular "Kermit and Friends" podcast; former keytarist for Cobra Starship; fame-seeking ex-girlfriend of Howard Stern Show writer Benjy Bronk
Replies
65
Views
12K
  • Sticky
Mundane Ralph is a Fat Flaggot. (Last updated on 05/28/2021)
Replies
153
Views
16K
Top