I hit gold again. Here's /u/Bardfinn openly admitting on Reddit that he's a dad, (and not a "mom" like he now is LARPing at being on Twitter):
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How motherly and feminine of him that after 5 months he still can't put on the diaper right. (And this isn't even the worst story I know. I remember these twins I knew who once told me a story about how they had runny noses when they were little but since they couldn't blow their noses by themselves yet, the dad got fed up and slurped the snot right out of their noses with his mouth. A hero.)
Goth Dad is terrified of a crowd of Reddit users and mods he has smeared and cyberstalked reaching out to Reddit Admins to report him, so he tried to pre-empt any incoming reports to the admins with a bullshit "security advisory" on /r/modhelp... that was immediately deleted, presumably because it was one of his usual rants about Natsees and fascists under every rock on Reddit:
Come on Penny, post the original "security advisory" to /r/fairmod I wanna see what feverish conspiracy theory you came up with this time.
Also, cut the crap with your self-victimization narrative. "The unequal power dynamic" here is powermods like you using your seniority on the site and the fact that you know the ins-and-outs of Reddit reporting and rules to throw the book at all these young newbies and low karma users who couldn't possibly stand up to you because for the most part they are simply too inexperienced with Reddit and don't know how. Most people don't even know what an API is, let alone how you are using it to cyberstalk them. You rely on this ignorance to target them, knowing that they will most likely respond with shock and awe at you cornering them with their history: "OMG, how does he know all this about me?! He must be some dangerous superhacker to be able violate my presumption of privacy like this!". "The unequal power dynamic" is that everyone on Reddit hates you and what you are trying to do to the site and desperately wants you gone, but you assume yourself "too big to fail" on Reddit just because of your self-appointed vigilante status and the fact that you claim to know and have conversations with Steve Huffman personally. How dare you paint yourself as the victim here, when everything plainly shows how loopsided the reporting system is in your favour.
OMFG you guys, imagine what would happen if Penny had to turn off his mean API jerking off machine from jerking off the fuck out of users for seven whole days? That's enough time for Natsees to take over every sub on Reddit during his absence. The whole of Reddit will be a copy of Stormfront by the time Penny comes back on. And what would Hikikomori agoraphobic PTSD OCD autistic Penny do for seven days without API access to cyberstalk all those Natsees? Would he get his ass whooped on Quake Champions? (Very feminine choice in gaming, I know.) Would he have to actually go outside?
I remember these twins I knew who once told me a story about how they had runny noses when they were little but since they couldn't blow their noses by themselves yet, the dad got fed up and slurped the snot right out of their noses with his mouth. A hero.
I should be allowed to fill an enema bag with hot coffee and nutmeg without everyone being all like "LOL whitey loves pumpkin spice"
Third idea is to have an "Autist of the Month" contest where every month we pick the most autistic poster and sacrifice him to the volcano gods for a good harvest
I can’t believe I had to join this site, that’s so dumb and stoopid and I hate it because it’s full of nazi pedophiles that stalk and harass the pure and innocent Christine Weston Chandler because they are losers that eat poo poo and smell, I can’t believe I had to join it because TRANS WOMEN MEN TRANS WOMEN MEN FJJFJDHNXSPKSHX DJANANDBRHCJDNBDHDJCNDND.