Containment What If?

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A-№1

A Hobo With Options
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Sep 6, 2013
Chris' hygiene seems to improve when he's not at 14BC.

True, but the only times he's not been at 14BLC in recent years, he's instead been incarcerated with shower schedules etc. so that probably doesn't count. Also there's not much to distract him from remembering to use the toilet in jail. If he had a television and the entire DVD collection of pony shows, likely he'd have "accidents" again: "I'll go shit after this episode ends… too late."

I don't believe his hygiene improved while he and Barb were living in the rental while 14BLC was being rebuilt.

Besides, it's not the shitting himself that's the worst part. It's him doing nothing about it after that's truly horrifying.
 

Broseph

"Well Wraggle my Graggle!"
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Apr 6, 2015
The pony people seem to have inspired him to wash a bit more. But he’s still incontinent.

Chris’s life might be worse without trolls, given how they’ve donated to him in good times and bad.
Nigger everyone knows that bronies don't shower.
 

Pointless Sperg

Crying Anchuent Cherokian
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Aug 2, 2021
That's not the same as saying he smelled good. Also, you have to remember that he was being compared to the average con attendee. The hygiene bar is probably set a little lower at pony conventions.

Fair enough, but imagine the shame of being more disgusting than Chris.

Christian, get off the game and go to the bathroom, now. YOU'RE SHITTING YOURSELF!

Some people derive pleasure from trying to hold their shit in, or just do it reflexively because they are too fixated on something else. I'm pretty certain Chris is one of these things.
 

Pointless Sperg

Crying Anchuent Cherokian
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Aug 2, 2021
What if Chris had a Death Note? who would he take out first?

In the past, Clyde Cash. And it would obviously fail since it's not his real name, so instead tons of internet personalities that he got fake dox on would die instead. Probably Michael Snyder too.

Nowadays? Who knows. Chris hates people less these days, even that Judas @Null . He talks about the toxics dying in fire, but he doesn't name them really.
 

PsychoNerd054

Done by a thug.
True & Honest Fan
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Joined
Aug 1, 2017
Nowadays? Who knows. Chris hates people less these days, even that Judas @Null . He talks about the toxics dying in fire, but he doesn't name them really.
Chris states in his recent letter that two types of people he considers "toxics" are the police and politicians, meaning he wants them dead now as much he did during the "Classic" era. He has also come to see Bella and Jacob Sockness as his arch-nemeses, alongside Null.

I believe I said this sometime before, but it's really ironic how despite being a tryhard, and failing at everything she sought out to do, Bella turned out to be one of Chris's newer Clydes after all.
 

90theguy

kiwifarms.net
Joined
Feb 6, 2021
What if the threat Chris made in April 2012 of "coming after each of you all" and "knowing where you live" was actually true, and one by one the Trolls start to disappear?
 

SwanSwanson

kiwifarms.net
Joined
Apr 6, 2022
What if Chris had a Death Note? who would he take out first?
Imagine Chris Chans reaction to a shinigami, imagine being the shinigami that has to follow Chris around.

Anyways to answer your question: he'd likely take out Donald Trump, Mary Lee Walsh and Michael Snyder. Chris Chan seems to be somewhat lazy and likely execute people who've personally wronged him. He wouldn't be a danger to the whole of human society because of how simple minded he is, the real concern is what if a troll were to attain the death note? What if Bella got it? What is the government finds Bella and they have the death note?

What if Chris' AGP delusions had become real?
If Chris Chan became the attractive girl he'd always dream of being it would likely result in him becoming the biggest whore
What if Bella got caught early and Fiona and Chris got hitched,causing the birth of Crystal?
An infinitely darker saga than the one we have currently. Let's say they gave birth to a female Child, Best case scenerio Fiona would likely be doing all the work in taking care of it. Crystal Chandler would likely grow up being the most strange smelly child ever. I can only hope Fiona would put effort into making Crystal a decent person.

Let's say it was a male baby, Chris would likely name him Sonichu and automatically dislike him for being a dirty dang male, he'd likely try to get him to transition.


Anyways any offspring of Chris Chan would likely grow up in a hectic unpleasant life, you have to realize that Chris Chan doesn't give a shit about his pets and yells at them in the most menacing voice. He's likely do that to his Children. They'd likely end up hating Chris and might even "become" trolls.
 
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Pointless Sperg

Crying Anchuent Cherokian
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Aug 2, 2021
If Chris Chan became the attractive girl he'd always dream of being it would likely result in him becoming the biggest whore

Only if he wanted to fuck men. Lesbians still wouldn't put up with his bullshit, even if he became a physically attractive woman.

EDIT: Unless he was willing to fuck non-passing transwomen. He'd get somewhere then.